I didn’t always enjoy being single. Like many other single women, I just wanted to get married. It seemed that was the next level my life was meant to take. Then I started doing these six activities and being single wasn’t so bad after all.
There were other things to do that made life in the present more enjoyable. Similar to what happens at restaurants when we are waiting for our order. I want you to try picturing this; you’re at a restaurant with some friends. You place your order and start waiting for your meal to come out.
As the waiters keep bringing out plate after plate, you keep checking to see if it is yours. Yet, time and time again, they pass your table and go to others. You are not really paying attention to your friends as all your focus is on what has not turned up at your table.
Who can blame you? You are hungry. Eventually, your food comes out but guess what; you missed out on the bonding experience you could have had with your friends. That’s what happens when you focus so much on marriage. You miss out on the present and don’t really get to live life the way you should.
As you look forward to your marriage, here are six activities you can do.
Spend time building your key relationships. After a few years of being single and searching, I knew I had grow my relationships. As a Christian, the key ones started with God and myself. If I could get these two right, my other relationships would have a better me which in turn would mean better relationships with others.
Focused on my career and dreams. Apart from wanting marriage, I also wanted to succeed in my career. I wanted to be the best I could be and being single wasn’t going to take my eyes off the prize. This didn’t mean people didn’t have an opinion of how I should look and behave, so my success didn’t scare men away. I just chose to go after my career and dreams anyway.
Embraced new experiences and opportunities. Being a bit introverted, I was not always keen to step out of my comfort zone. However, I came to realise that new experiences made my life at the time richer. It was eventually in one of those new experiences that I met my husband.
Stopped comparing my life to another’s. The uniqueness of who we are also means that our life’s journeys are also tailored to us. The same way we all aren’t born on the same day in the same year, so also we can’t all get married on the same day, month or year. This freed me from the belief that I was missing out by being single.
Prepared for the marriage I said I wanted. No one starts a journey without at least checking they have the supplies for the trip. If not, you are likely to get part way and be unable to continue. I learnt that being single prepared me for the rest of my life, including my marriage. Once I knew this, I embraced preparing for marriage with both hands.
Learnt from my mistakes. I look at mistakes as missteps in the direction of destiny, that should show us a way not to do a particular activity. For example, one mistake I made was to “help” relationships along because I didn’t want to be single. If the guy showed a smidgen of interest, I took that to mean that things were a go, instead of letting things to evolve at their own pace.
There you have it. Six activities that will change the way you enjoy this time. By the way, I help single women like you to wait gracefully for their marriages in my Waiting Gracefully Program.
It is a 90 day group coaching program for high achieving women like you, giving them the perspective and tools to enjoy being single and maximise their waiting season.
Join the waitlist HERE.